In the beginning, the heavens and the earth were already in place. “How did that happen?” EP wondered. Besides the heavens and the earth, EP saw that there was light, darkness, day, night, water, land, and seas. EP saw that it was good.
But EP didn’t actually have the name EP yet. So, on day one, she pondered names. The most accurate name would be Evolution Personified or EP for short. Most Exalted Creator would be a fun name, or The Great Designer, but in the end, she stuck with EP.
Then she got to work. On the second day, she created cells. On the third day, photosynthesis. On the fourth day, eukaryotes. On the fifth day, multicellular life, plants, arthropods, and mollusks. And on the sixth day, EP created mammals, including humans.
EP was proud. Each life form was keenly attuned to its own place in the world, its own ecological niche, sometimes it was even close to the optimal design for that niche. EP was a functionalist, believing that each creature’s design should maximize the odds of propagating that design, with some random variations thrown in to enable evolution. “Form follows function,” EP said, feeling rather clever.
On the seventh day, EP planned to rest. But just before settling down for a nap, she glanced down at the Earth and saw something quite shocking. The humans had invented something they called a “wheel.”
The invention of the wheel shook EP to the core. She had never considered such a thing. Surely some of her designs should have wheels. But even more distressing: “I am no longer the only Creator. When I created humans, I accidentally created a second generation of creators.” Was her status as Most Exalted Creator threatened? Now her creations would be sharing the universe with the humans’ creations. The implications were hard to contemplate. Her first reaction: “Humans, I shall smite thee.” But, uncertain how Evolution Personified would go about smiting something, she opted for a different approach. “Humans, I shall watch thee for a while.”
On the eighth day, things got even crazier. EP realized that the humans were on the verge of creating yet another generation of creators, a third generation of creators, which they called robots. “This has gone too far. Humans, I shall visit thee.”
It is morning at Cranberry Melon University. Professor Moses is in the lab, all alone. Students are not expected before noon. Moses is working on a new humanoid robot, with the torso open to expose some wiring and circuit boards. He hears something and turns to find EP standing in the middle of the lab, wearing a toga.
“I am EP, Evolution Personified, and the Most Exalted Creator. You may worship me if you wish.”
“Hah! Good one. And I love your costume, but I’m busy right now. Can you come back during office hours?”
EP realizes a demonstration is required and creates a burning bush in the middle of the lab. “Do not come any closer! You are standing on holy ground!”
“Wow,” says Moses, “great trick. Now get out of here. I’m calling the campus police.”
This is not going as planned. EP decides to try a more humble approach. The burning bush evaporates. “Wait one second on that call. I have an idea I think you will like. I am a creator, like you. I am interested in the creation of life, and robots, just as you are. What if we played a game? You play the role of a roboticist, and I will play myself, Evolution Personified, and we can discuss the design of intelligent machines and life forms.”
Moses pauses, studies EP for a second, then puts away the phone. “Okay, I’m game. So you, Evolution, are looking over my shoulder, watching me work. What do you think?”
EP looks at the humanoid’s innards and is bewildered. “Maybe I should have prepared, studied ahead,” she thinks. The interior of the robot is perfectly dry — no blood, no guts. Wanting to dig in, somehow, she points at a tiny colorful piece of the robot’s innards and asks, “What is that?”
“It’s a resistor,” Moses says.
EP: “Okay, fine, it’s called a resistor. But how did you choose that particular resistor for that particular spot?”
Moses: “The application notes for the angular resolver specify a resistor, with the resistance value calculated to match the op amp’s impedance.”
EP heard mostly gobbledygook, but absorbed the main point: “You calculated it? You can calculate aspects of the design? Your designs don’t evolve?”
Moses replies, “We can calculate many of the details, but the designs also evolve. Successful design concepts are retained and sometimes they are applied in new designs. But this happens in the heads of the designers, not in the genes of the creations. Robots do not have genes.”
EP: “So. Our design processes are quite different. What about the outcomes? How do we compare your creations with mine? My creations don’t need external power sources, or maintenance. They repair themselves and they feed themselves. They are totally self-sufficient, even in reproduction and individual development. After comparing my animals with your robots, I think maybe this extreme autonomy is my greatest accomplishment. Don’t you care about that?”
Moses must think about that one. Then he replies, “Some of my colleagues do care about that, and they have designed some machines to explore it. But I think, as a whole, you are right. It is not at the top of our list. My automobile needs to be fed gasoline, and serviced, but the main thing is that it provides transport. If we dream of a future where robots do not depend on human maintenance, it will be because other robots provide the maintenance, not because each robot maintains itself.”
Moses goes on, “Let me ask you a question. If you were designing an organism for my home, instead of a humanoid, what would it be?”
EP suppresses a laugh at Moses’s ignorance. “It’s already done, but it isn’t just one organism, it is thousands. An entire community. You are just one of the designs sharing your home. Fungus, mold, cockroaches, weevils, house centipedes, spiders, the list goes on and on. Haven’t you noticed them?”
“Oh, yeah, of course,” Moses says, “but they are not helping me; they are a nuisance. How would you design an organism to serve my needs?”
“That’s your job,” says EP. “Selective breeding. You hijack the evolutionary process by replacing natural selection with your own choices. I would suggest you start with cockroaches. They are remarkably resilient.”
Moses: “Breeding cockroaches? They are disgusting!”
“Disgusting?” EP cannot suppress a laugh. “I am not constrained by such an irrational repugnance, or cockroaches would not exist. But perhaps it is unkind to laugh. Your reaction is innate, so it is really my fault.”
Moses considers this and says, “I do like stag beetles. Maybe I should start a stag beetle breeding program, and breed them for intelligence, so they can understand English.”
“Fine,” EP responds, “let’s say you breed stag beetles for intelligence. What happens if they are smart enough to have their own goals? Rather than serving humans, might they choose to serve themselves, even create their own breeding programs? They might breed dung-beetles to fight for them, or mice as mounts. Or, rather than breeding, they might follow your example and start building robots.”
As Moses ponders this scenario, EP decides to leave and do some further pondering on her own. “Gotta go!”
Moses: “This has been fun. I wish I had taken some notes. Could you hang on just a bit longer, and let’s write down a summary.” Moses heads to the whiteboard and picks up a marker.
EP replies, “That won’t be necessary. I’ll leave you a record.”
And with that, EP disappears. Moses is puzzled. “Leave me a record? What did that mean? A record where? When?” And then Moses looks down at his electronic tablet sitting on his desk, and sees:
The Ten Suggestions
- Know your goals.
- Build to learn.
- Watch for lucky accidents.
- Analyze, optimize, randomize.
- Distrust disgust.
- Creation begets creation.
- See the intelligence all around you.
- Dream of creations that surpass you.
- All of life is an experimental project.
- Wonder. Ponder. Dream. Build. Dance.
Bravo. I never say bravo but this text demands it. I like the many themes you are able to articulate in this passage going from being humbled that we were created (not necessarily by divine creation) to being humbled by our creation. There are more. I may ask my class to read this.
I appreciate the Ten Suggestions – good to be reminded to look at the big picture instead of just flogging at the details. And speaking of details, is that robot in the background completely over-constrained? Never mind, Evolution’ll fix it.
Ha! I guess it is obvious an AI helped with that picture. Either ChatGPT or ImageFX. That was the best out of maybe 100 or so. Maybe next time I will sprinkle some of the truly outrageous pictures through the text.
This is a fun read. Looking for a second episode expanding the theme: “Some of my colleagues do care about that (extreme autonomy), and they have designed some machines to explore it.”
I don’t know enough about autonomy to write a second episode about it. I just vaguely recall some papers on robots that forage, and even turn some organic stuff into energy. Should we also include robots that plug themselves in? That would include one of the earliest bots, the Johns Hopkins Beast, and I suppose the Roomba and others. But nothing approaching typical animal autonomy levels. Maybe other readers know more about it. Anyone?
Thanks Matt! Another thought-provoking Mason Fable. (Cranberry Melon… hehe.)
Now I have to confess — I stole the Cranberry Melon thing. There used to be a poster or something around CMU, advertising the Cranberry Melon University, School of Cucumber Science. But, thanks for the kind words!
A sticker on a pole near Morewood Ave, next to CMU campus:
Haha. Even better than Cranberry Melon.
When I was reading the beetles part, I started thinking, “If I am an intelligent robot, I will create some dumb robots so I don’t have to work”.
Then I realized, “Oh, I don’t have to do it. I can use part of my computation to run the task in the background, and the major part of my consciousness can have fun in simulation”.
And then I thought, “Wait, but what is the point of having fun in simulation? Who am I? What is my purpose? Perhaps I should just work, which is what I am built for…”
I liked the part where EP suggests selective breeding to Moses (EP learned quick). Would be nice to see Moses visit EP in her lab.
Matt, this is wonderful in so many ways and for so many reasons! I look forward to the next one!
Excellent! I’m so glad I ate dessert tonight. This was masterful and thought provoking and oh so yummy. Lots to think about.